A friend of mine recently started a blog and I think she thinks she is funny or something. Her hand-crafted personal tales will be sure to make you laugh, so check her out. Here is my own hand-crafted holiday tale meant to seem as if it is an homage to her work, but really it is my attempt to upstage her… Seriously though, check her out.
So this one time when I was with the L.A.P.D, we were tracking down this ex-military general who was bringing drugs into the states. I was feeling a little down at the time because I was a widow and it was Christmas and well there was a nasty drug dealer pushing smack in my town.
Anyway, I partnered up with this old cop and together we brought this whole ring of drug dealers down. Unfortunately, in the process we destroyed his house and half of LA. But it was Christmas, so people were pretty generous about the whole thing.
Just when we thought it was all over though, I was working my extra job at the train station when this guy I was in love with but had never really talked to got mugged and fell into the tracks. Well, being the good person that I am, I jumped into the tracks to save him. Unfortunately, he lost his memory and there was all this confusion about us getting married and he forgot to tell me about his pet mogwai.
So, I rushed over to his house to feed him, but it was after midnight. Well that was a mistake. Next thing I know, there are all these terrible monsters terrorizing the town. To top it all off, someone left a baby on my doorstep. Once again, I am a nice person, I couldn’t just leave this poor baby to freeze in the frigid LA winter. So, I took the baby in but then people started to think it was mine and that the father was the son the owner of the department store that I worked at for some extra cash. The holiday season is hard. Well by the end of it all, I just pretended that I couldn’t speak English and I waited for Batman to save us from the Penguin.
Autumn Siders 