In Remembrance

I spent the whole day remembering
so many little things I forgot
and then I spent the night wondering
where my life went off track.

Was it when I turned my back
on what I’d always known
or when I fell right into
your smile, your laugh, your lies?

I think back to a simpler time
and I know things weren’t so simple
and I think back to life divine
and know it was all in my head.

When did I forget
exactly who I am
and when will I remember
how to be her again?

© Autumn Siders 2018

In the Light

I knew what you wanted
by the look in your eye
but somehow I knew
it wasn’t happening tonight
so as I walked away
you made your move
and stopped me before
I had the chance to disapprove.
Something about
that look in your eye
moved me to tears
as I let out a sigh.
A sucker for maidens
and damsels in distress
all it took was mere minutes
before you were undressed.
I know that tomorrow
I won’t look you in the eye
as I scurry from your warmth
and form my next lie.
Was it worth it for you
to succumb to the night
when we both knew what
this would look like in the light?

© Autumn Siders 2018

Does She Know?

Does she know your favorite song?
Not the one by Drake
but the one you put on repeat
that summer we spent at the lake.

Does she know you hate your boss
but love your job?
And when you think of quitting
you go to the bathroom to sob.

Does she know the story
of the scar on your knee?
Or did you tell her the short version
you tried to tell me?

Does she know that look
that pierces right through
and uncovers every lie
turning it into truth?

Does she know that smile
is just hiding the tears
or that once upon a time
I helped you fight your fears?

Does she know my name
or that I even exist?
Does she know that my charm,
you couldn’t resist?

Does she know the reason
why you walked away?
‘Cause I’d love to hear
what you never did say.

© Autumn Siders 2018

Emoji

How long has it been
since last we spoke?
A year, a week, a decade
at most.
I remember a time
when not a day passed by
without an emoji from you
or a simple sigh.
Hard to believe
that bond we once shared
disappeared as fast
as our fire flared.
I still think on us
time and again
and wonder where life
begins and ends
and I think in another life
we could have been
friends.

© Autumn Siders 2018